Tips for Advocating for Yourself

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PDF - Advocating for Yourself: Tips for People with Disabilities (And Their Supports)

PDF - Everything You Wanted to Know about Advocating for Yourself Respectfully and Effectively (full 4-page guide)

The Best Advocacy Is Clear, Respectful, and Prepared

Asking for what you want and need to protect your rights as a person with a disability is an important skill. Learning to advocate for yourself in a respectful, direct, and effective way will improve your chances of success! Below are six key tips that will help you speak up for yourself and be heard. 

For every tip, remember: you don’t have to do this alone! Part of self-advocacy is asking for help when you need it.

1. Prepare Before You Speak

  • - Know what you want and why. 
  • - Gather your documents, facts, and examples. 
  • - Write down your "talking points" (the main things you want to say). 
  • - Avoid surprise meetings. Take time to prepare so you feel confident. 

2. Talk to the Right Person

Find someone who can actually help fix the issues you are having. This might be a care coordinator at a Managed Care Organization (MCO), a nurse, a doctor, a group home manager, or a policy maker. 

Start with the person most connected to the problem and most able to act on it. 

    3. Stay Focused and Calm

    • - Stick to your main points. Don't go off-topic. 
    • - Practicing ahead of time can help you stay calm, even if the issue is emotional. 
    • - It's okay to show some emotion - just try to stay as calm as you can so people can hear you clearly. 

    4. Use "I" Statements, Not "You" Statements

    Speak from your own experience and give examples. 

    Say: "When this happened, I wasn't able to get the help I needed."
    Don't Say:     "You didn't do your job!"

    This keeps the conversation positive and helps others listen.

    5. Be Assertive, Not Aggressive

    Being assertive is being confident, respectful, factual, and direct.

    Being aggressive is blaming or raising your voice. 

    You can be strong without yelling or getting angry. Calm, factual communication is more likely to solve problems and keep good relationships. 

    Examples of assertive vs. aggressive statements:

    Assertive: "In the last IEP, there are goals for my child that could be modified or changed to give him more success." 

    Aggressive: "You put some goals in this IEP that are not helping my child learn. You need to change them now!"

    Assertive: "I have been working here for 5 years, and I believe I am a good employee. What are the policies for raises and when are they given?" 

    Aggressive: "You know I am a good employee, and you haven't given me a raise. Do it now or I quit!"

    Assertive: "I understand what you are saying. But is there another way?" 

    Aggressive: "You are wrong! That would never work!"

    6. Follow Up and Thank Them

    At the end of a meeting, thank the person for their time. 

    Ask: 

    • - What are the next steps? 
    • - When will I hear back? 
    • - How can I stay in touch? 

    Get the person's contact info so you can check on progress later. 

    Tips for Advocating for Yourself